i'm sorry im stupid.
but i tried.
im sorry i cant do that stupid animation shit.
i admit, im an IT moron.
i admit im dumb.
i admit im not as smart as ur other daughters.
but i tried super hard.
i searched every frigging webby.
and everyone ive tried.
its never good enough.
doesnt that sound familiar?
just like the past.
the past.
do you even remember?
im never good enough.
you never want to acknowledge me as another one of ur flesh and blood.
since young,
ur other daughters had wonderful gifts whenever u came back frm overseas.
and i?
yeah i got a cool gift.
i got some free thing u got from sq airlines.
i know im not as smart.
i know im not as capable.
theyre in nanyang, crescent.
and im in queenstown.
where's that?
damnit.
i know im never good enough.
but now im telling you,
i tried my frigging best.
i dont make the best coffees or teas,
i cant cook like the rest.
let's draw the line.

i know i shldnt be blogging this shit,
but ive no diary to write about.
and if i did, i might have tore the paper.
so here,
my sorrow is written.
black and white.




i entitle this..feelings;

Sometimes when I feel unimportant,
I think of being big
and strong like an elephant.

If I feel timid and shy,
I can be like an eagle,
flying high in the sky

If I dont feel beauty and wonder,
I think of the peacock
with his feathers tucked under.

If I dont feel pretty and spry,
I remember that the cocoon
becomes a butterfly.

When I dont smile
my Gran says I look
like a crocodile.

If I start to fret about tomorrow
I think of the flowers in the field
and the little sparrow.